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第109章 Was That Okay?(4)

This generation,your generation I know,has developed a finely honed radar for B.S.Can you say“B.S.”at Harvard?The spin and phoniness and artificial nastiness that saturates so much of our national debate.I know you all understand better than most that real progress requires authentic—an authentic way of being,honesty,and above all empathy.I have to say that the single most important lesson I learned in 25years talking every single day to people,was that there is a common denominator in our human experience.Most of us,I tell you we don’t want to be divided.What we want,the common denominator that I found in every single interview,is we want to be validated.We want to be understood.I have done over 35,000interviews in my career and as soon as that camera shuts off everyone always turns to me and inevitably in their own way asks this question“Was that okay?”I heard it from President Bush,I heard it from President Obama.I‘ve heard it from heroes and from housewives.I’ve heard it from victims and perpetrators of crimes.I even heard it from Beyonce and all of her Beyonceness.She finishes performing,hands me the microphone and says,“Was that okay?”Friends and family,yours,enemies,strangers in every argument,in every encounter,every exchange,I will tell you,they all want to know one thing:was that okay?Did you hear me?Do you see me?Did what I say mean anything to you?And even though this is a college where Facebook was born,my hope is that you would try to go out and have more face-to-face conversations with people you may disagree with.

That you‘ll have the courage to look them in the eye and hear their point of view and help make sure that the speed and distance and anonymity of our world doesn’t cause us to lose our ability to stand in somebody else‘s shoes and recognize all that we share as a people.This is imperative,for you as an individual,and for our success as a nation.

“There has to be some way that this darkness can be banished with light,”says the man whose little boy was massacred on just an ordinary Friday in December.So whether you call it soul or spirit or higher self,intelligence,there is,I know this,there is a light inside each of you,all of us,that illuminates your very human beingness if you let it.And as a young girl from rural Mississippi I learned long ago that being myself was much easier than pretending to be Barbara Walters.Although when I first started because I had Barbara in my head I would try to sit like Barbara,talk like Barbara,move like Barbara and then one night I was on the news reading the news and I called Canada“Can-a-da,”and that was the end of me being Barbara.I cracked myself up on TV.Couldn’t start laughing and my real personality came through and I figured out,oh gee,I can be a much better Oprah than I could be a pretend Barbara.

I know that you all might have a little anxiety now and hesitation about leaving the comfort of college and putting those Harvard credentials to the test.But no matter what challenges or setbacks or disappointments you may encounter along the way,you will find true success and happiness if you have only one goal,there really is only one,and that is this:to fulfill the highest most truthful expression of yourself as a human being.You want to max out your humanity by using your energy to lift yourself up,your family and the people around you.

Theologian Howard Thurman said it best.He said,“Don‘t ask yourself what the world needs.Ask yourself what makes you come alive and then go do that,because what the world needs is people who have come alive.”The world needs……People like Michael Stolzenberg from Fort Lauderdale.

When Michael was just 8years old,Michael nearly died from a bacterial infection that cost him both of his hands and both of his feet.And in an instant,this vibrant little boy became a quadruple amputee and his life was changed forever.But in losing who he once was,Michael discovered who he wanted to be.He refused to sit in that wheelchair all day and feel sorry for himself,so with prosthetics he learned to walk and run and play again.He joined his middle school lacrosse team and last month when he learned that so many victims of the Boston Marathon bombing would become new amputees,Michael decided to banish that darkness with light.Michael and his brother,Harris,created Mikeysrun.com to raise1million for other amputees—by the time Harris runs the 2014Boston Marathon.More than 1,000miles away from here these two young brothers are bringing people together to support this Boston community the way their community came together to support Michael.And when this 13-year-old man was asked about his fellow amputees he said this,“First they will be sad.They’re losing something they will never get back and that‘s scary.I was scared.But they’ll be okay.They just don‘t know that yet.”

We might not always know it.We might not always see it,or hear it on the news or even feel it in our daily lives,but I have faith that no matter what,Class of 2013,you will be okay and you will make sure our country is okay.I have faith because of that 9-year-old girl who went out and collected the change.I have faith because of David and Francine Wheeler,I have faith because of Michael and Harris Stolzenberg,and I have faith because of you,the network of angels sitting here today.One of them,Khadijah Williams,who came to Harvard four years ago.Khadijah had attended 12schools in 12years,living out of garbage bags amongst pimps and prostitutes and drug dealers;homeless,going in to department stores,Wal-Mart in the morning to bathe herself so that she wouldn’t smell in front of her classmates,and today she graduates as a member of the Harvard Class of 2013.

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